KOBE BRYANT-a rapist and a thug with those half-lidded lazy eyes that make you want to punch him.
RON ARTEST-another thug who no one likes. He isn't real loving towards fans. Consequently, he was cut out of the NBA's commercial to the fans in which the words "fans we love you, thanks for a great season" appeared.
ANDREW BYNUM-with all this draining of the knee, he is being contacted by the makers of Drano, the pipe unclogger, to appear in advertisements.
SHANNON BROWN-looks oddly similar to the musical artist Chris Brown, you know, the one who beat up his girlfriend. His doppleganger is more like a dopple-I'm gonna smash your head-er.
JORDAN FARMAR-looks like a leprechaun with those ears that stick out so much, he could probably go sailing because of all the wind they could pick up.
LAMAR ODOM-the third thug, and as ugly as the rest of the team.
DEREK FISCHER-"helped" his daughter, and her eye, by not re-signing with the Jazz (where the best place in the country to get treatment for that is located) and then signing with L.A. to be "closer" to his daughter (who's at a hospital in New York). I guess he'll just see her sometime, though she might not be able to see him back.
SASHA VUJACIC-first of all his name is Sasha. Second, he's just a mini Gasol: whiny, annoying, and ugly.
ADAM MORRISON-does he even dress out? Not to mention, he's that Gonzaga player who led to the nation's halt in rooting for Gonzaga.
LUKE WALTON-makin' daddy proud by giving quality minutes riding the pine
DIDIER ILUNGA-MBENGA and JOSH POWELL-Wtf? Who are these guys? Have they always been there?
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